Finding my why

For me, this debt reduction is always about having my step-son back to live with me again.

When I first split from his Dad, littl'un spent every weekend with me, and as he got older I was looking forward to a time when he'd be able to catch the bus from school, and come and spend the evening with me a couple of days a week as well.

However, his Dad moved to Wales to be with his new partner. And because of the huge distance, and the price of travel, this means I can only see littl'un a few times a year. It's hard, to say the least. We speak on the phone every day, send emails and photos, and so on. It's not the same as being there, though.

When he visited in August, he'd grown taller than my Mum. I hope he hasn't overtaken me yet!

So for the last year or so, the agreed-on plan with my Ex has been that when littl'un turns 15 (which is in July 2010) he will come to live with me, for his last year of secondary school. By this point he will be mature enough (hopefully) to be able to get himself to and from school on time and cope with being on his own for the odd Saturday. I'll be able to use my holiday to cover about half the school year, and he can go to his Dad's for the rest.

Childminders simply aren't an option at his age. When we were first splitting up, I tried everything to keep him with me, but I simply couldn't find any facility for kids of his age. There is a massive gap in the market there, if you ask me: affordable, reliable childcare for kids between 11 and 16.

Anyway, that's the plan. The catch is, I really really want to move to a good area, within the catchment area of a good school, ready for when he comes. Because he has mild learning difficulties, and because his Dad finds it hard to support him educationally, he is already up against the odds. I need him to be in a school that will support him, where he can concentrate on studying hard and getting himself up to speed for his GCSEs. For preference, I also want to hire a private tutor for English and Maths, to give him the best chance of passing those two crucial subjects.

If I am still in debt when he comes to live with me, we're going to end up either staying where we are, or moving to a worse area where he'll end up in a crappy school. The local school is not very good (going by exam results.) I will not be able to afford any extra tutoring. Likely result: he leaves school with no or very few qualifications, and enters a depressed job market where he will find it very difficult to get anything except menial work.

If, however, I've managed to get myself debt-free (or very nearly) then I will be able to afford considerably more rent, and some tuition. Hoped-for result: we live in a nice area, where he makes some good friends, is happy at school and able to concentrate on working hard and improving his levels, and leaves school with enough qualifications to get a better-paid job or onto a NVQ course or apprenticeship.

So that is WHY I am so focused on paying down my debt in a short amount of time.